Leave it to Boston Red Sox fans to lead the charge trying to accuse the New York Yankees of cheating when a) they’ve been the second-worst offenders in terms of bending the rules in the modern era and b) they just spent an entire offseason disrespecting their franchise player to welcome in a new third baseman who might leave after 2025. “Cope”, as the kids say nowadays.

But the Yankees’ use of the new “torpedo” bats cause quite the stir over the weekend, with the initial blowback focusing on the equipment being illegal. That was quickly debunked after Saturday’s nine-homer game, when various insiders worked hard to get to the bottom of what had happened. You’d think Red Sox fans would’ve supported getting one of those bats to Rafael Devers, who has now struck out 15 times in his first 21 plate appearances. Is that good?

Unfortunately, “content” trumps “truth” in today’s media landscape, so when Barstool Sports’ Dave Portnoy, sporting a Red Sox hat, decided to go on a Sunday evening rant spewing all of the incorrect information, the conversation further devolved into lunacy.

Obviously some of this was rooted in “humor” (pending audience), but you can bet it emboldened the worst type of people on the web, and also, unfortunately, roped in Yankees slugger Jazz Chisholm.

Emergency Press Conference – Ban the Yankees Torpedo Bat Before it Ruins Baseball pic.twitter.com/LX1iDZ7wUg

— Dave Portnoy (@stoolpresidente) March 30, 2025

Bartstool’s Dave Portnoy gets into social media feud with Yankees’ Jazz Chisholm Jr.

Before we get into the back-and-forth with Jazz, here are some all-time quotes from Portnoy’s rant that were specifically designed for somebody to create content around it.

“Aaron Judge is hitting home runs, he says he’s not using a torpedo bat. He is. Take a look.”

In hilarious fashion, X, of all platforms, debunked that quote:

Aaron Judge can’t stop hitting BOMBS@StoolBaseball pic.twitter.com/01mAVo7ay4

— Barstool Sports (@barstoolsports) March 30, 2025

“Should it be legal? No. Is it cheating? Yeah it is.”

It is not cheating. The design was approved by MLB (confirmed by an MLB spokesperson) and it does not violate any rules.

“This is ruining 100 years of baseball.”

Haha.

“So again, I’m fine with it … but you gotta get rid of the torpedo bat.”

Yes, totally.

“The Yankees have a long history of cheating and being scumbags, and this is the latest, but then again I think I saw another guy on the Twins using [a torpedo bat].”

The 2018 Red Sox cheated en route to winning a World Series. Their manager, Alex Cora, who was found guilty (and suspended) for his actions in helping develop the 2017 Houston Astros sign-stealing scandal, bragged to the 2018 Red Sox about it. And the 2018 Sox had a video room employee take the fall in one of the funniest scapegoat scenarios in baseball history. But MLB only likes the Yankees. Forgot.

We get where Red Sox fans are coming from after their 1-3 start and their franchise player looking like a shell of his former self, but Yankees players can’t get sniped in the process.

Cheap laughs. Sometimes that’s just how it goes. The Barstool Machine nearly chewed one up and spit one out, but we’ll point out and give Jazz credit: he got more likes and retweets on his messages than Portnoy. Chalk one up for the good guys, but of course that won’t be how this is remembered.

This you ain’t it? https://t.co/VFJzFD1MAZ pic.twitter.com/B2rhURxXem

— Dave Portnoy (@stoolpresidente) March 31, 2025

Got ’em with the fake picture! You know, those bats nobody noticed when they were introduced during the 2024 season? The Yankees are cheating, but players on the Orioles, Reds, Cubs, Twins, Mets, Rays and Blue Jays are using the torpedo bats, too.

On one hand, we have fans complaining that offense in the modern game is suppressed because of how pitching has an unfair advantage due to random, faceless guys throwing 100 MPH. On the other hand, we have others complaining after one series where a ton of runs were scored because the Brewers were down eight of their best pitchers against a lineup of All-Star-caliber players.

The conversation is over, though. Brewers manager Pat Murphy, who won NL Manager of the Year in 2024, attributed the run scoring to the Yankees’ capitalizing on his team’s mistakes over and over again. Go back and watch the tape. Any team throwing that many balls over the plate is going to pay for it … just like the Brewers did again on Monday when they lost 11-1 to the Royals.